Rebirth of Reason


Phallophobic Feminism
by Alec Mouhibian

I’m not much for playground gender discourse. Men aren’t from Mars—and as far as I’m concerned, if women were really from Venus, they’d have three boobs.

Yet there are certain phallophobic feminists who’ve taken the gender-war discourse of a 1st grade playground and turned it into an academic discipline. The resulting, cootie-entrenched philosophy has fueled a radical anti-sex movement that goes by the name of “gender studies.”

Gender studies thinkers are so far to the left that they’re lucky the earth isn’t flat. Their intellectual idols, such as Andrea Dworkin, essentially believe that all hetero sex is rape. Even worse, they automatically label as “sexist” and have attempted to criminalize the free speech of anyone who challenges them. This has nothing to do with dialogue or discourse on gender issues—but with one long vagina monologue that seeks to viciously silence all other views while promoting sexual paranoia, political correctness, and lies. 

The most notorious of those lies is that “1 in 4 women are victims of rape or attempted rape.” This was the result of a doctored study commissioned by gargoyle Gloria Steinem. It turned out that 73% of the classified victims didn’t believe they were raped and 44% continued to date their “rapists.” Equally false are a number of statistics spread by campus feminists regarding sexual violence. (Just a local example: despite the fact that there are roughly 25 reported incidents of abuse per year at UC Santa Barbara, our Women’s Center claims there are 500, based on the totally arbitrary estimate that only 5% of incidents are reported.)

These lies and factual manipulations are still circulated because they were the only basis for the wave of laws that classified the likes of eye-contact as “sexual harassment” and regret as “date-rape.” PC prudery has largely been retired by the real world, but it has a nursing home in academe, where it lives on as a frail attempt at justifying the belief that all the world’s horrors are the fault of masculinity and “rape culture”—as manifested, apparently, in flirtation and sense-of-humor.

Now I’ll readily admit that the word “rape” kind of turns me on, but that’s only because it rhymes with “ape.” It requires a remarkable ignorance of history, art, and biology to believe that rape is a social construct, rather than a pathological failure to control natural urges. Rape has existed in every culture, everywhere, ever since. That it involves natural urges is proven by the fact that the most attractive age-group (16-24) is over 8,300 times more likely to fall victim. That violence against women is pathological is proven by the studies that show the vast majority of wife-beaters to be criminals who also beat men.  

As usual, the solution isn’t to haplessly ignore nature but to learn how to deal with it—which means emphasizing empowerment over victimhood, and realizing that women have never had more power and protection than in “patriarchal” capitalism. By systematically evading reality, feminism teaches women, not how to wisely wield their God-given whip, but how to strangle themselves with it.

Harboring such ignorance is itself a form of intellectual masturbatory rape—in the sense that you’re screwing yourself without knowing it.

But an honest and healthy understanding of rape would undermine gender feminism’s morbid Marxist ideology and its dogmatic agenda to de-penisize society. Their attitude seems particularly pathetic in light of our campus, where female sexual confidence reigns supreme.

I surveyed 100 random women on campus to ask whether they ever attended or benefited from the Women’s Center in any way. Exactly 9 said yes. True, sampling was biased toward those whom I didn’t smell from ten feet away. Still. The numbers at least suggest that academic feminism is only relevant to a tiny number of women, the type who mistaken Lynyrd Skynyrd for a dictionary. And any guy who pays lip-service to feminism only does so in hopes of getting lip-service in return.

We need counseling for rare victims of real violence. We also need to pursue an impartial and intellectual study of sex. But neither goal should be exploited as a politicized medium for propaganda, as it has been by feminist institutions on campus. All they’ve done is to contribute false information and to literally put the “y?” back in women. What a legacy.

It’s time to put this diseased sacred cow out to pasture.

[This article first appeared in UC Santa Barbara's newspaper, The Daily Nexus. An amount of furious response unprecedented in the paper's history, has followed.] 
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