| | A few years ago, the Washington Post had a contest among its readers concerning new entries to the Periodic Table like this. Here are a few of my favorites from their readers:
Politicium Po
Contains a great deal of gas. Similar to radon, in that it can reach
lethal concentrations in the House.
Congress Cg
Atomic number 525. Can never be found in a solution.
Innoffensium Pc
Precisely equal numbers of electrons, protons, neutrons, leptons, and
quarks. Completely inert, utterly useless, but smells like a rose.
Cabmium Cb
Found in abundance, except when needed. Exists in two states, in motion and
at rest. When in motion, it cannot be stopped, no matter what you do.
Cabmium has a charge associated with it. The charge is variable, and
scientists have not determined the formula for calculating it.
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