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Quotes: Carlin, George


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In the Bullshit Department, a businessman can't hold a candle to a clergyman. 'Cause I gotta tell you the truth, folks. When it comes to bullshit, big-time, major league bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims, religion. No contest. No contest. Religion. Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told. Think about it. Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever 'til the end of time! But He loves you. He loves you, and He needs money!
George Carlin

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(Added by Warren Chase Anspaugh on 6/23/2008, 9:24am)
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What do firefighters fight? Fire. what do crimefighters fight? Crime. What do freedom fighters fight?
George Carlin

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(Added by Landon Erp on 10/02/2005, 4:09pm)
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