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GUNS and DOCTORS a. The number of physicians in the United States is 700,000 b. Accidental deaths caused by Physicians per year is 120,000. c. Accidental deaths per physician is 0.171. (US Dept. of Health & Human Services) THINK ABOUT THIS: a. The number of gun owners in the US is 80,000,000 (yes, eighty- mill... (Read More) (Added by Peter Skup on 5/25/2005, 12:20am)Discuss this Joke (3 messages) Introducing the new Bio-Optic Organized Knowledge device, trade-named - BOOK. BOOK is a revolutionary breakthrough in technology; no wires, no electronic circuits, no batteries, nothing to be connected or switched on. It's so easy to use, even a child can operate it. Compact and portable, it can be used anywhere - even sitting in an armchair by the... (Read More) (Added by Luke Morris on 6/16, 1:45pm)Discuss this Joke (10 messages) A friendly jest at our American counterparts: ... (Read More) (Added by Tim Sturm on 8/18, 3:39am)Discuss this Joke (16 messages) In light of the rising frequency of human/grizzly bear encounters, the Alaska Department of Fish and Game has issued the following advisory to hikers, hunters, and fishermen while in the field: ... (Read More) (Added by Marty Lewinter on 9/29, 1:27am)Discuss this Joke (2 messages) I promise you cannot read these and not laugh and maybe out loud. These are REAL notes written by PARENTS in a Tennessee school district... (Spellings have been left intact.) 1-- MY SON IS UNDER A DOCTOR'S CARE AND SHOULD NOT TAKE PE TODAY. PLEASE EXECUTE HIM. 2-- PLEASE EXKUCE LISA FOR BEING ABSENT SHE WAS SICK AND I HAD HE... (Read More) (Added by Ciro D'Agostino on 10/26, 7:28pm)Discuss this Joke (10 messages) A Christmas Story 'Twas the night before Christmas--Old Santa was pissed. He cussed out the elves and threw down his list. Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks. I have a good mind to scrap the whole works! I've busted my ass for damn near a year, Instead of "Thanks Santa"--what do I hear? The ... (Read More) (Added by Ciro D'Agostino on 11/29, 9:23am)Discuss this Joke (4 messages) We hold these postulates to be intuitively obvious, that all physicists are born equal, to a first approximation, and are endowed by their creator with certain discrete privileges, among them a mean rest life, n degrees of freedom, and the following rights which are invariant under all linear transformations: 1. To approximate al... (Read More) (Added by Sarah House on 12/15, 12:58pm)Discuss this Joke (8 messages) Human cloning is outlawed because if Chuck Norris were cloned, then it would be possible for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to meet another chuck Norris roundhouse kick. Physicists theorize that this contact would end the universe. They say that it’s impossible to breathe in space. Tell that to Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris makes onions ... (Read More) (Added by Jenna W on 3/18, 1:07pm)Discuss this Joke (58 messages) "Lord, I have a problem." "What's the problem, Eve?" "I know that you created me and provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, as well as that hilarious comedic snake, but I'm just not happy." "And why is that Eve?" "Lord, I am lonely, and I'm sick to death of apples." "Well, Eve, in that ... (Read More) (Added by Luke Setzer on 4/27, 5:20am)Discuss this Joke (11 messages) Two Arabs boarded a flight out of London . One took a window seat and the other sat next to him in the middle seat. Just before takeoff, a Marine sat down in the aisle seat. Shortly after takeoff, the Marine kicked his shoes off, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the Arab in the window seat said, "I need to get up and get a ... (Read More) (Added by Ciro D'Agostino on 10/26, 6:56pm)Discuss this Joke (1 message) |